Because You Want to Prevent Cancer

So you've read a couple of my blog posts, or followed a tweet, or seen my facebook status changing (or been invited to an FB event), and are curious about fighting cancer -- but aren't sure that giving money is the right option for you. So you're looking for something else to do.

Look no further.

I've been talking about Cancer Prevention Study-3 quite a bit over the last few months, but I haven't discussed it in much detail online. CPS-3 is the third in a series of lifestyle studies, designed to follow a tremendous number of individuals over a broad spectrum of time, in order to determine some of the common factors among those who develop cancer -- and those who don't. The link above will tell you more, but even better is the video clip below, courtesy of sharinghope.tv. Give it a view.

If you're between the ages of 30 and 65 and have never had cancer, this is your opportunity to be part of the research in a more tangible way.

P.S. If making a donation is something you'd like to do in order to help, I, for one, would be enormously grateful.

Lessons Learned

Last summer, I sat down to one of the most intimidating tasks I've been given: my boss, whom I like a great deal and respect even more, asked me to define the three most important areas of focus for my department in the coming year, and, when that was done, told me to choose the one issue for which I had a solution, and on which (in my solitary opinion) spending the bulk of my energy would have the greatest positive impact organization-wide. Once I'd spent two weeks of sleepless nights evaluating and second-guessing myself and presenting the combination of data- and gut-reaction-driven information -- he charged me with sticking by that decision, making it the focus of my work for the next twelve months.

Considering I'm a person who falls in and out of love with concepts, languages, plans, hobbies, and experiments as often as I change my sheets (twice a week, generally), and that I don't generally think things through backwards and forwards before I jump up to commit myself, this was terrifying. After all, I quite like my established, life-long patterns of "try something for awhile and see if it works -- if not, abandon it" -- even when the sometimes-spectacular failures can be spectacularly mortifying.

The thing is -- my think-it-through-and-then-stick-to-it charge has paid off so dramatically well that I'm black and blue from pinching myself, and I've annoyed the hell out of my colleagues, whom I keep pestering to check my math: my little department has brought a greater-than-20% bump in income to the table -- about double the increase I was anticipating 9 months ago. Which means that my wonderful boss was, again, brilliant. And that a crazy-difficult assignment was worth the near-ulcer of stress that it caused.

Also, I've learned something from this experience that I need to take forward with me, at least for the "big decisions."

1. When dreaming-to-plan, look at the whole picture.
   Make lists. Weigh pros and cons. Think of every worst case scenario and argue through it, then argue someone else through it. Think of every best case scenario, put a terrible caveat on it, and argue through whether the best is worth the worst.
   
   
2. Be cautious.
   Figure out the best possible outcome and the worst possible outcome, accept both as possibilities, and realize that what will come about most likely falls somewhere in the middle.
   
   
3. Trust instincts.
   My instincts are actually pretty damn good -- better than I give them credit for, most of the time. When faced with two equal choices in every other regard, I've got to go with the one my gut tells me is the right option.

I'm actually quite glad to be ruminating on this concept at the moment.

Last Wednesday was the most recent forum for public hearing discourse on the proposed townhouse I wanted to buy. This one included full sketch plans, detailed information about the proposed societal structure -- HOA, zoning, open space agreements, ownership designations, protective governance ... a whole bunch of detail that prior to this week wasn't to be found.

Looking at the whole picture (what I know about Saratoga Springs from living here most of my life, what I know about my dreams and plans and major objectives for the next ten years of my life, and what I now know about the details of this opportunity), examining all of the options with caution rather than throw-it-to-the-wind risk-taking, and trusting my gut -- this is not the right option for me. Given that I raced rather headlong into the idea, with all of my usual furor and excitement, tossing out the window all of my ideas and lists and long-term plans ... well, like I said before, "the sometimes-spectacular failures can be spectacularly mortifying" -- and this didn't get beyond the idea stage to become a failure.

What I'm most-disappointed about? Affordable housing in Saratoga is such an oxymoron, and this proposal has the Saratoga Snob set in such a tizzy, that the controversy on both sides is explosive -- and I'm really spoiling for a fight that I now don't get to be a part of. Although that's another "negative personality trait" that I'll have to learn to overcome, I'm sure.

Some other year, please.

I have the Best. Parents. EVER.

Dad and I spent Saturday making multiple trips to Lowe's. On Sunday, Mom and Dad both spent the late morning and early afternoon on my patio; Mom gauging new jewelry designs for the business, Dad helping me build the raised bed garden I designed over the winter. Three hours and a lovely lunch later, I had "a garden" -- or, a big wooden box sitting in the dirt. I poured 400 pounds of composted manure and topsoil into the space, raked it through the existing soil, and rebelled at the thought of dragging myself back to the garden center for more soil to level the bed.

I got home from work about 45 minutes ago. It's pitch black outside, and I didn't expect to be late, so the porch light was off. I flung the flotsam of my day across the sofa and picked up the phone to start returning phone calls -- when I returned Dad's call, I was a little mystified by his instructions.

"Go outside and look at your garden."
"But, it's dark."
"Turn on the light, go outside, and tell me what you see."
"Oh, wow! You bought me dirt for my birthday!"

My wonderful, indulgent, delightful parents delivered twenty bags of compost and topsoil to my house, raked and tilled it into the garden, and left it as a surprise for me to come home to. Which, it being dark, I totally missed. But that is not the point. I have dirt! For a garden! And I shall plant on Saturday!

My 29th birthday? TOTAL WIN. Even if it isn't for another week.

Vetting a Fundraising Activity

I tweeted about this blog post on Friday - Our Bodies, Our Blog's information on vetting a Breast Cancer Fundraiser before choosing to get involved - but want to take a moment to explain why I'm "proud to work at ACS," and proud to gauge Making Strides Against Breast Cancer against any such rubric.

OBOB asks a couple of great questions:

1. Will your donation or the funds you raise directly support local community efforts to assist those in need or support the kinds of research you'd like to see done?
• Yes and yes -- some American Cancer Society programs to support women (and men) diagnosed with breast cancer provide instantaneous, reliable information about treatments and procedures, including all available information about cutting edge options, as well as matching opportunities for individuals in need of highly specialized care. Other programs aim to provide the services, comfort, and assistance required to measurably improve a patient's quality of life. ACS funds groundbreaking research protocols (including those which led to the development of mammography and of Tamoxifen), but the Society also links interested members of the public with organizations enrolling test subjects in research on lifestyle and environmental agents -- projects like the Sister Study and CPS-3.
  
  
2. Does the activity make it possible for all women, regardless of socioeconomic background, to participate, or only women who have the means to raise substantial amounts of money?
• Absolutely -- cancer doesn't discriminate, and neither does ACS. Everyone is welcome at Making Strides, whether one is a committed-body-and-soul Pacesetter raising tens of thousands of dollars individually, or an individual who's never made a donation but who's looking to learn about prevention and detection or raise awareness of breast cancer as a political issue. Anyone who wants to make a difference is welcome, be the difference small or large.
  

But on one point, the post misses the mark:

"Next time you are approached to participate, or to sponsor a participant, start by asking for more information about how the money will be used. If you're not satisfied ... consider [supporting] ... a trusted national organization ... which gets that instead of just "fighting" for an ever-elusive cure, the hard work to be done includes advocating for more effective, less toxic treatments; reducing health disparities based on race and income; and funding research that looks for environmental and other causes."

Seeking out more information about any organization approaching you for a donation of your time or money is always a good idea. However, with regard to the last statement, I would argue argue this:

Cancer -- breast cancer and all other types -- is a public health crisis. As such, the "ever-elusive cure" refers not just to the medical treatment used to return an individual to health, but a widespread solution to the crisis -- research and delivery of prevention and detection modalities and post-diagnosis treatments that are non-disruptive and non-invasive; eliminating healthcare disparities based on every sociological factor (not just race and income) and ensuring full access to healthcare for everyone; both legislative and public advocacy to keep the crisis front of mind (and at the fore of action) -- until it is resolved.

THAT will be a cure.

That my definition of cure is matched by ACS' definition? That's why I'm proud to be working on Making Strides.

Captain's Log, Blog Post 100

I've been on a bit of an unplanned hiatus for the past few weeks, inspired at first by not having much to say, and continued on purpose after realizing how much I enjoy spending time away from a desk. In that time, I've

• Reconnected with old friends
  
• Met a few new people
• Turned off the heat, opened the windows, and welcomed spring
  
• Realized that I really dislike children. Individual small people brought into my life by adults I adore (looking at Mary and Becca and Becky, here) are little ones that I learn to love dearly (and affection grows exponentially as they become more capable of rational thinking), but in general small humans are infuriatingly messy, noisy, and irritating. This has drastically altered my interest in spending time in public places during particular hours of particular days.
• Found a fabulous bike (a 1970s Schwinn Suburban) and realized that I can refurbish it, with a little help, myself.
• Finished raking out the garden and started looking forward to framing the raised bed, adding composted soil, and tilling.
  
• Felt the pinch of our shrinking economy on my wallet - and gave thanks for having the foresight to reduce consumer debt when I did. My belt is staying cinched for another six months, and then I'll be able to loosen a few notches and breathe more easily.
  
• Started an informal carpool, saving up to 96 miles of driving per day between three drivers
• Discovered Twitter and rewrote my mental pitch for eMarketing within 6 hours of doing so
• Become impossibly bored with my nearly year-long experiment of heightened eco-political awareness. Individual actions that fit into my life (which has more of interest in it than only trying to live without impact), I'm all about. But the socio-political calls to action from a vast group of people, none of whom can decide on what is or isn't the best way to proceed... not for me. There are too many other problems in the world for which I can contribute creative solutions.
  
• Grown to hate, loathe, and abhor running, exacerbated by the fact that my previously-injured ankle is not happy with high-impact activity and thus causes serious discomfort at the most inopportune times. I'm seeing the training plan through to the end of this week. If the pain (or my tolerance for it) hasn't improved by Monday morning, the running will be done.
• Remembered how much I love early morning walks, in any neighborhood.
• Found my rollerblades, and cheered the street sweepers who were out in full force yesterday, making it safe for me to lace up today.
  
• Determined that I want this blog to be a little more connected to the other web-based work that I do, and a little less full of meaningless blather.
  

14 days since my last post, 14 things I've accomplished or realized or learned in that time. Not too shabby.

I'm not quite sure how things will be changing around here, apart from knowing that they will. I'll be writing a little more about healthcare and a little less about the environment, and drawing attention to a broader variety of things. I'll be dropping a variety of web-based accounts in order to focus a little more fully on the ones I do enjoy (shutterfly, twitter, technorati, del.icio.us), playing around a bit more with open ID and claim ID, thinking more about eCommunication in general. Although I'm sure I'll have the occasional photo of my nephew, update on buying a house, or book review, in general I'll probably be focused a little more on the world I inhabit while at work.

And I don't mind if that means that some of you want to abandon the ship, thinking me a boring old wind bag of a captain. I'd like to think I'm upgrading the rowboat to something a little more 21st Century, that's all.

Running, after Freddy

Isn't he the most adorable little boy in the whole world? The eyelashes just slay me.

It is "really spring" in Saratoga -- ignoring the idea of more snow and icy rain on the way. Yesterday, I drove home from downstate with the windows open, this morning I took a 6am walk without freezing myself into an icicle, and tonight I will be transplanting my seedlings. Not to mention that the whole world is twitterpainted. Whee, spring!

Personally, I've fallen in love with running. Well, the idea and goal and drive of running. One of the projects I've been working on for the last couple of months is a series of websites for endurance events -- mountain climbing in Africa, cycling events, and marathons. And the newest member of my team at work is a competitive runner, who is so full of energy and enthusiasm that it bubbles over to everyone around her. Couple that with my long-time interest in running (I've tried to get myself on solo plans twice before, as posts on past blogs will testify) and my desire to lose 25 pounds....

I found the Saratoga Stryders Running Club, and have been speaking with one of the organizers via e-mail today. I'll hit my first training run on the last Saturday in April. I've built the Couch to 5K training plan into my daily schedule over the next 8 weeks -- 6 per the plan, and two in case I need extra days. I'll culminate with my first scheduled 3-mile, all-running, all-the-time activity on the night of my Relay, so will bring my running shoes and a change of clothes. On June 11, I'll start speed training with the Runner's Club on Wednesdays, and I'll run my first competitive race on July 26th: the Silks and Satins, to open the racing season. I say competitive, but my only goals are to run (not walk) the whole thing, finish the race, and not injure myself. Frankly, those are lofty enough.

I may post about the process of "becoming a runner" now and then, and will definitely welcome advice or encouragement from anyone else out there who is (or dreams of being) an athlete. Any runners in the mix?

Serendipity

Earth Hour
First of all, tonight is Earth Hour, the time when we're all supposed to be cognizant of the environment together for an hour -- and a continuous 25 hours, as the planet spins and each time zone hits 8 o'clock. Kudos to those of you ding something special to commemorate. I signed up to participate a couple of months back and have been receiving the updates, but my realism has finally overpowered my desire to OMG Save the World -- I'm not going to do anything differently from 8 to 9 o'clock than I do during any other given hour. I'm already purchasing sustainable energy and using it sparingly; reducing, reusing, or recycling everything I come into contact with; purchasing sustainable products as best I can; avoiding those who treat me as a consumer; planting a Victory Garden and joining a CSA; and trading the use of my car for my own feet (and eventually a bicycle) whenever possible. I need to put my active, creative energy toward something else for awhile, or I'm going to explode. So during earth hour, I'm sitting in my study with the computer on, the reading lamp on, and a cup of hot tea on the desk. As usual, all of the other appliances in the house are unplugged (except the dryer and the grow lights over my seedlings) -- because they aren't in use.


"Something Else" -- House!
I've written several e-mails with that subject line this week, all following up on my tremendously exciting townhouse opportunity. I've spent every spare moment of the last several days (not that there have been many) scouring the web for zoning information and procedural policy, and having a wonderful time. Yes, I recognize that this makes me an absolute nerd -- but I'm a nerd with a mission.

Wednesday night was the city Planning Board meeting, which I attended with notebook and pen in hand. The proposal for Railroad Place is still in the most preliminary stages -- Wednesday's discussion was focused on the prerequisite re-zoning of the current land parcel to allow for something other than warehousing, which is the designation of the parcel currently. A few important points on this which I have learned in the last week:

• A change in zoning is a legislative deal -- the Planning Board makes a recommendation to the City Council, which then proposes and enacts a formal, legal change that affects multiple parties. Zoning designations are not permanent -- they may be legislated whenever due cause is presented that an alteration in land use is necessary.
  
• Once a zone change is effective, a parcel of land may be used only in accordance with the new designation. in this case, the parcel in question is currently used for warehousing, and the rezoning will designate the land for residential use. Once that happens, the warehouses and storage facilities come down -- regardless of whether or not the parcel is developed further.
• Residential properties within unmasked (or arguably poorly masked) sight-lines of a warehouse zone have depreciated value.

These points are important based on the behavior, demeanor, and all-around Saratogishness of the members of the "residential public" who also attended Wednesday's meeting. Approximately two-dozen people from the neighborhood just next to Railroad Place took advantage of their residential right to categorically denounce the project and to state for the public record their disapproval of "any changes to this parcel or any other area." Their public argument was "we have serious problems with storm drainage that have not been resolved; any change in population density would dramatically increase those problems." I concede that this is a serious concern -- not only for them, but for any builder or developer, and anyone looking to move into the area; no one wants to invest in a sinking or flood-likely home. But because of that, no reputable builder or developer would embark on construction without first addressing the issue -- which will alleviate the problem not only for the new buildings, but for others in the area as well. The developer in question is reputable -- he's managed 19 successful projects in 20 years, the most recent with tremendous positive feedback from some folks in the capital region that I know and respect. So, as far as I can see, water drainage complaints are moot.

The private argument, however, was being whispered all around me, as residents commiserated in the benches, presumably believing that I either couldn't hear them, was on their side, or was sympathetic to their opinion. The private argument was in "keeping property values up and keeping them out," "them" I presume, being people like me, who can't afford to purchase a small house with a $250,000 pricetag, or a luxury condo for a cool million. "Them," was said with all of the disdain one might expect to hear in reference to drug dealers or violent criminals or other such undesirables.

Ah, Saratogishness. The snooty, entitled, snobby priggishness of a certain class of middle-aged white people living in Saratoga Springs. It's been such a constant in my life that I can't say it's surprising or demoralizing -- merely laughable.

The good news is that the members of the Planning Board are clearly interested in sustainable urban growth and development -- evidenced by the other proposals they heard and the reactive discussion surrounding each one -- and were just as clearly unimpressed and irritated with the public complaints they heard on Wednesday. I fully expect that a Zoning Change will be recommended by the Planning Board as being in the best interest of the city, and that the Council, after whatever time of politicking is required, will approve it. Then we'll have the warehouses removed (improving property values and boosting city revenue, yay), the environmental engineers in to deal with the drainage issues, and -- if the other proposals heard Wednesday were any indication -- a series of extensive discussions and counter-proposals with regard to Railroad Place. And eventually something will be decided upon and approved, after which point the whole thing will probably be built and landscaped within 15 months, since I suspect the people who build things around here of having hidden, Rumplestiltskin-like talents.

Whew.

I'm still ridiculously excited. But I'm not quite so driven to think OMG must do every single thing right this very second. Looking at the requisite lead times for various actions and the politics of the City Council, I anticipate that the earliest that the zoning change will be complete and a formal proposal can then be heard is 3 months from now. I can worry about a mortgage and such at that point -- especially since Mr. Olsen (who I introduced myself to and had a lovely conversation with) is building relationships with a pair of banks in the region to provide additional incentives to first-time home buyers on the list for these homes (he has my card and I'm on the list). Special rates for first-time buyers (which I am), for those contributing to environmental improvements and community beautification (which this property will do), and for those whose property contributes to Historic Preservation (the entire parcel is adjacent to a Historic site, so we'll see how that pans out) -- mainly, I want to be sure I'm doing things properly to take advantage of the full opportunity. So, timing is not as urgent as i thought.

My next step is to complete the composition of a letter for the Chairman of the Planning Board, per request of the City Planner. Because I'm not a city resident and don't have a predetermined vested interest in the project, I'm putting my thoughts and opinions as a nearly life-long county resident and future city resident on paper for the Board. If they're interested in hearing more from me, we can continue to communicate through correspondence or I may be invited to speak at an open meeting as a guest of the city. Which means that I have a few more things to learn about zoning in the next few days, so I can drop off that letter this week.

And, since I know that Becca and Phoebe at least will be reading this with a mindset of "that's all nice, Lis, but tell me more about the (town)House!" here are more specs on the proposed townhouses -- know that this will probably be altered in some degree before everything is ultimately approved, though!

• Each structure will contain four units, each multi-storied with a single-car garage, single-car driveway, front yard, and back yard. The end units will also have side yards.
• Each unit will be approximately 1,200 square feet, with 3 bedrooms and 1-1/2 baths. (That means I'll have a formal home office -- yay!
• The sketches indicate an Alpine Lodge styled design, but the newspaper photo has more of an Adirondack appearance -- I'm reserving judgment until we get to the proposal hearing, at whcih point all of that will be discussed prior to approval.
• The proposal includes stipulation for a neighborhood association to maintain an 8' privacy fence from the adjacent shopping plaza, landscape masking, a separate adjacent hiking path, and the pedestrian right-of-way -- the new road would be public city property, thus maintained by the city. The area is supported by county sewers and city water -- lines are already laid and accessible, as are electric transformers.
  
• The proposal indicates 24 structures to get to the 96 units on 7.78 acres -- depending on the results of any findings on population density and utility resources, that could be reduced.

So, those are the specs. Whee!

I'm going to be a home owner. Possibly before my 31st birthday, which is still 2 years away (and then some). I'll be purchasing said home on my own, and will be taking responsibility for it solo. I have a killer job (yeah, one of these) and a brilliant career trajectory. I am living in one of the most beautiful places in the country, and it turns out that I get to stay. My friends and family are doing well, and the circle of people I love best seems to be widening a bit with some new friends and neighbors, and some old friends that I'm now growing closer to.

How on earth did I get so lucky?

Home Owner?

Earlier this morning, I followed my usual Saturday morning routine, heading into town to the Farmer's Market, the Four Seasons, and the Saratoga Bead Shop (on a purchase mission for my Nana). A typical Saturday morning, but one which has me all in a tizzy this afternoon.

You see, an article ran in yesterday's paper about a new housing proposal in the city -- 96 units in a townhouse structure, in an easily accessible, neighborhood area of town, designed for middle class, working people in size, scope, and price.

My head is spinning.

The Real Estate crash is evidenced all over the place -- certainly in many of the places I've traveled in the last six months -- but not in the Capital-Saratoga district, where the average ticket for a new home is $310,000 and climbing.

But a 3-bedroom townhouse in my favorite city, in the area where I grew up and am putting down roots, where I have the best job I can imagine and career prospects that dazzle me daily -- in an actually affordable price range? I'm so excited by the prospect that I can't figure out whether to bounce like the Easter Bunny and clap my hands with glee, or stand paralyzed with terror, afraid of a glass dream that might shatter at any moment. (You can imagine what that's doing to my insides!)

View Larger Map

I just dashed off an e-mail to the journalist, asking for any additional information or resources he might be willing to share with the public. I've arranged to attend the Planning Board meeting on Wednesday night, to learn as much as I can from the proceedings. I'm staring at the business card of my parents' financier, steeling myself to make a telephone call and arrange a meeting, to discuss home financing approval -- because if this thing *is* approved, I want to be first in line.

I'm struck dumb.

Progress Report: Read 75 books in 2008

Books 16 - 22 of the 75 I plan to read in 2008. These have sparked some thoughts, some projects, and some head-shaking at my neighbors.

16. Jo's Girls: Tomboy Tales of High Adventure, True Grit, and Real Life, by Christian McEwen (ed.)
I found this anthology at Orchard House, the Alcott Museum in Concord, MA a few years ago, and have been reading it one story at a time over the last six months. I've read and enjoyed many of the full-length works from which excerpts were taken (Maxine Hong Kingston's Becoming the Woman Warrior, Leslie Feinberg's Stone Butch Blues, Toni Morrison's Sula, etc), but something about the editor's notes in this collection grated on my nerves. Growing up female in America takes many faces and forms, yet McEwen struck me as being particularly adversarial: none but her specific, tomboy women were worthy creatures. An instance of output failing to match intent, but one that ruined some of the collection for me. On the other hand, Becca, based on our November dinner conversations and the Oracle's Queen reading, I think Lynn would really enjoy it.

17. The Good Husband of Zebra Drive, latest in "The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency" series by Alexander McCall Smith
I love this series (and, noted below, McCall's way of story-telling) -- one character revealing bits and pieces of a her personality slowly while drawing us into an exotic scenery full of people we come to love. The language never lasts with me long, but the vivid imagery of life in Botswana has been imprinted on my brain.

18. The Sunday Philosophy Club, first in the "Isabel Dalhousie" series by Alexander McCall Smith
After Zebra Drive, I picked this one up at the library, looking for something new from an old friend. I wasn't disappointed. Isabel is a character I already love: delightfully quick and yet full of foibles. Edinburgh is dashingly different from Botswana, and requires a quicker, sharper image context -- but the story itself and the moments of human revelation still happened at a natural (rather than rushed for the denouement) pace. The quiet deftness captures my attention very well, and I enjoy the process of reading as well as the story.

19. The Long Winter, Laura Ingalls Wilder
I've decided that this will forever be my "go to" book in times of seeming "I Can't Do It"-ness.

20. Persuasion, Jane Austen
Inspired by the Masterpiece Theater All-Jane-Austen-All-The-Time film adaptation showings this winter and spring, I brought my volume of collected works along on my business travels. Persuasion is my favorite of Austen's novels; there is so much in it of tempered but undying hope. I'm an optimist -- a sucker for hope at every turn. It's a novel of second chances, and traits of peace-and-patience learned by trial and experience -- clearly the work of a mature woman who has known something of disappointment and yet not been destroyed by it.

"How eloquent could Anne Elliot have been! how eloquent, at least, were her wishes on the side of early warm attachment, and a cheerful confidence in futurity, against that over-anxious caution which seems to insult exertion and distrust Providence! She had been forced into prudence in her youth; she learned romance as she grew older: the natural sequel of an unnatural beginning."

And of course, it contains perhaps the best love letter ever penned by a fictional character:

"...You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you. Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant.... Too good, too excellent creature! You do us justice, indeed. You do believe that there is true attachment and constancy among men. Believe it to be most fervent, most undeviating, in

F. W.

"...A word, a look, will be enough to decide whether I enter your father's house this evening or never."

21. Emma, Jane Austen
For all that I aspire to win Anne Elliot's respect, I have no patience for Emma Woodhouse. Conceit and snobbery don't strike me as amusing in the least, and the idle gossip with which so many of the characters in the novel busy themselves is tiresome in fiction as well as in life. In all of Austen's other works, there is an element that the reader wishes to see expounded upon -- be it a courtship and romance, a bit of mystery, or a question of fate or justice. I turned each page of this (exceedingly long) novel desperate for something to care about, and yet found nothing worth my attention. I'm hoping that Andrew Davies' screen adaptation will broaden my understanding of this character that Jane Austen herself described as "a heroine whom none but myself will much like."

Of those few lines which I did enjoy, this one is my favorite:

"I shall not be a poor old maid; and it is poverty only which makes celibacy contemptible to a generous public! A single woman, with a very narrow income, must be a ridiculous, disagreeable old maid! the proper sport of boys and girls, but a single woman, of good fortune, is always respectable, and may be as sensible and pleasant as any body else."

22. The Jane Austen Book Club, Karen Joy Fowler
I will state without apology or self-deprecation that I adore this book,which doubtless marks me as being far inferior to any Janeite. The characters are all likable (though some try very hard to keep a reader at arm's-length), and some are particularly warm and engaging. The irony of a group of Austen addicts approaching their lives with a view toward keeping the virtues of her characters alive, while being completely oblivious to the simultaneous personification of such vices as they possessed tickles me for hours.

I've been wishing for a book club to join for about two years, and I have given several groups a trial run (including one that I attempted to organize myself, via MeetUp) -- with each one, I've had a negative result. Over the last two weekends, I thought it would be a delight to join the public library's Jane Austen Discussion meetings -- first on Emma, and second on Persuasion -- led by a retired professor who specialized in the Great British Novels.

The first Sunday afternoon was delightful. I didn't enjoy the novel (which is the only one of the six that I hadn't read before), but I very much enjoyed the 2 hours spent in the company of a wide variety of Austen readers. The group was seemingly split about 50/50 between those who love literature, particularly enjoy Jane Austen, and wanted a chance to discuss their thoughts, and those who consider themselves Jane Austen experts and wanted the opportunity to pass an afternoon feeling cultured and beautifully bright and engaging. The irony of a group of 50 year-old women cavorting themselves with snide snobbery while claiming that the faults of Emma Woodhouse are those belonging to "any young, ignorant person thinking that her home is the center of the universe" was too delicious not to adore -- I spent the afternoon bubbling over with laughter (though I behaved with proper decorum, as befitted the subject matter). Some of the "lesser attendees," like myself, were quite fun to talk to, and I was glad to find that I wasn't the only reader uncharmed by Miss Woodhouse. Unfortunately, what was delightfully ironic while discussing a novel and heroine I didn't care for became insulting and insufferable when applied to Persuasion, an earnest and honest book about fidelity and second chances, which I actually wanted to talk about.

So, I'm back to the drawing board with my Book Club. What I want is actually something along the lines of the JABC -- a small group of people, a finite reading list and a term limit -- 6 people, 6 books, 6 months is a manageable commitment, requires each person to lead once, and yet doesn't permit room for slackers. I'm thinking that if I can find five truly like-minded people in the area, looking for an enriching reading experience, we could each make a list of "ten books I've always wanted to read yet haven't gotten around to," cross-reference them, and come up with 6 books that would allow a good time to be had by all. That can't be too much to ask.

Brown, and Green, and Pink -- oh my!

Tonight, I have many little green pokey shoot things -- and some of them are curly and pink!

The green sprouty bits on the left are Cosmos (the tall one near the tag is the strong little guy that popped up yesterday), and the curly pink ribbons on the right are the Mina Lobata. The other cells are doing well, too, but for the Brandywine Reds.

My garden journal entry for the day:
March 18
- More seed babies! 2 lettuce, 1 onion, 2 marigold, 5 cosmos, 5 mina lobata (pink!), 1 morning glory (looks like a cracked twig), 2 moonflowers (orange lumps). Tomato seeds are slowpokes -- still nothing.

This is far too exciting.

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On another note, a shout out to the newest blog on my sidebar -- my little sister, GreenieMommie. Welcome to the blogosphere, Becky! Over time, you'll find that blogging is less like journaling and more like sharing your thoughts and observations and ideas with friends. Just make sure you have something to say -- shouldn't be a problem for my chatterbox sister!